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Posts Tagged ‘reflections’


I had another play with an app on Facebook.  Sometimes, they hit the nail on the head, sometimes it is just a play with words. Are they just looking in to a few shout outs I made there?

Here’s what it says:

Not everyone knows the fights you have had to fight in life. Not everyone sees your scars  and the things that you had to go through. What they see is a smile on your face  and assumes all’s well  but only you know how much you are hurting still.

It’s  partly true. One has to be strong to face all those early trials in one’s life. One has to have faith in what comes next. One has to believe.  Standing strong. Standing still.  These are words that  always stand out when I think of the past. These are words that make me hope  to be better, to dream more and just feel glad I am  alive.

The smile would always be there. I believe in greeting each morning with a big smile on my face. I believe  that everything would be okay the moment I wake up. I just believe. One could be sensitive and sentimental enough to reminisce a little of what has been, the good times would always be memories to cherish,   but sometimes one should be  bold enough to accept the truth that things happen (maybe for a reason), that they  are not  a part of one’s dream.  We should not be afraid to  see what is at the bend in  the road,  there is probably something more to discover  that  makes life more meaningful. When you have faced challenging circumstances in your life and you’re still standing, I call that courage. When you believe that eventually things fall into place, I call that faith.

I love this quote from Helen Keller: “Faith is the strength by which a shattered world shall emerge into light.”  

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As all things go, there is an end to  everything –  days, months and years included. And yes, 2016 is about to end and we think of those  things we did this year,  old and new friends  we met, family togetherness,  places we dreamed of  visiting,  lessons learned,  hours wasted on senseless thoughts (sometimes) and all the other things that make life and living worthwhile.

It’s been a quiet year for us except those times we went out as a family to  celebrate  birthdays and those times we had visitors at home to celebrate with us too.  It is always nice to get in touch with friends, sharing  meals together and being happy just exchanging news and ideas.  It is always nice to be with the whole family celebrating togetherness no matter how simple it is. We do find meaning in the ordinary things in our lives,  one has to look back, discern, and admire what is before us.  We find meaning in our brokenness, those times when we felt so down  and  everyone cared, we are just grateful for that.

Do you make new year’s resolution? I’ve never been good at keeping one.   They always get broken one way or another. So I dream, make some of it into reality and just enjoy what is in store.  The days are not always happy, some are like memories blurred at the edges, some are like a closed book so pleasant to discover, some are lovely thoughts waiting to be shared.

Blogging has become one major step to sharing with online friends. It is such pure heaven to meet fellow bloggers who share their lives, their hobbies, their families and their precious photos and memories. Blogging has become a daily exercise that I look forward to,  reshaping my views with the world outside. Blogging has become a pleasant tool  for friendship.  I’ve finally reached more than 2,000 followers including my 90 followers linked at Twitter.  Isn’t it nice that every day, the blog stats increase a little more than before? It’s close to 445,000 views now. I made a total of 157 blog posts this year, add maybe two or three more before the year ends.  The wonder of blogging. May I just thank you all for sharing with me through my blogs and yours? Thank you, thank you so much.

May  the next year be a pleasant, happy and fruitful one for all of us.  Happy 2017 guys.

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Whatever else be lost among the years, let us keep Christmas still a shining thing; Whatever doubts assail us, or what fears, let us hold close one day, remembering It’s poignant meaning for the hearts of men. Let us get back our childlike faith again.-grace noll crowell

Remembering this lovely message about Christmas. It’s that time of year again when we get so busy with preparations. There is a much-awaited guest, a little child born in Bethlehem.

The celebration of  Christmas may not be that always  happy for everyone. There are people who spend their  Christmas on the street on a cold winter night. There are people who make use of  cardboard boxes  in some corner for their beds. There are people who never know the twinkle of the tinsel on the  Christmas tree or the bright lights that adorn it. Christmas is just another day  or night of begging on the streets. Not all of us are lucky to  open gifts, prepare a lot of food on the table, exchange warm hugs  or listen to Christmas carols.  The joy that Christmas brings is non-existent in their lives.

What is happiness? People say happiness depends on our outlook in life, the way we experience things and the way we react to them. It is not so much  of the material things in our life but more on peace of mind, contentment, purity of heart, a positive attitude towards life,  a sense of well-being,  or a roof over one’s head and food on the table.

Happiness could be found in the simplest of things in our lives. A smile makes us happy,  more so when it comes from  strangers we meet on the streets. A  simple hello would put a smile on one’s face and is usually answered with another hello.

No matter what the circumstances, remember always to be happy. Celebrating Christmas is one reason to put a smile on your face.

 

 

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Lately, I promised myself to write everyday just like when I participated in WordPress’  Post A Day writing challenge back in 2011 but always, always I get distracted by other things.  There is always something that is ought to be done, there is always something that prevents me from sitting long enough to write a blog post, there is always something better and more urgent to do than blogging.

Josef and I had our twice a month visit at the wet market early this morning.  We make it a point to go there early so we could catch fresher produce.  It is easier to navigate the place when there are  few early risers like us.  One thing that I love about my suki (favorite vendors)  is that they give you discounts especially when you buy by the kilo.  My son knows where we buy meat, poultry, fish and vegetables. It is always a thrill to discover new things at the  wet market. Compared to prices in supermarkets, items are a lot cheaper and fresher.  Come to think of it, they give Christmas gifts too. My fish suki gives me a bottle of fish sauce every year, my other suki gives t-shirt.  Some of them give coin purses that are so handy to use when marketing.  Josef laughs at me when I smile bringing home  these gifts. Simple though they may be, but we always say, it’s the thought that counts.

It’s the third night of Simbang Gabi. 

Behold, the virgin shall be with child and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel.

Emmanuel means God is with us. The gospel today talks about the presence of God in our lives.  It is the presence of God which will complete us, not power, not wealth, not possessions.  We seek God’s presence, we knock so we could be heard and we do this through prayers.  We see  Jesus though in the Holy Eucharist.

emmanuel-god-with-us

May you all be blessed.  Have a nice weekend.

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dsc01351

Sometimes, one needs to be alone with nature –

absorbing the silence

thinking about life

wondering, sometimes always wondering

what it is all about.

Sometimes, one needs to be connected with nature –

listening to the hush of the wind

thinking about  journeys

 and the unfamiliar pathways

the uneven steps one has to go through.

But always  –

nature heals

nature inspires

bringing that familiar smile.

(click photo to enlarge)

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There comes a point in one’s life when it all goes down to reminiscing, remembering the past and some golden dreams.

Those times when your kids were just babies and you were learning how to change diapers and make “hele-hele”  while singing out of tune and discovering to your delight that you could compose  a particular tune right there, waiting for them to close their eyes and sleep.

Those times when you went up the stage every end of the school year to accompany your kids to receive recognition awards and medals.  You were so proud that they were so responsible in their studies.

That one particular afternoon when one of your daughter’s professors called you up over the phone just to say that deliberation was over and that your daughter will be graduating Magna Cum Laude.   You cried and jumped in joyful thanksgiving that she made it to that much coveted Latin honors.

The first time they shared their paychecks with you and said “let’s go out and celebrate Ma”.  Music to your ears.  And the following days when they would just say,  “let us do the grocery shopping Ma, just make a list of the things you need”.  Those days when you would watch movies together or just stay at  home doing a marathon of Prison Break until 3am. Those times playing couch potato with your daughter while waiting for her  final interview for  a new job, watching Korean movies on DVD.  Can’t forget the laughter and the crying sessions we had together.

The day that your daughter got married and you were happy and at the same time sad that she’ll be residing in another place and you won’t get to see her every day. Her excited voice  saying “are you ready to be a grandma?” a few months later and you were so excited you can’t wait. You were just as excited seeing a sonogram a few months after.

The joys of finally seeing your grandson and discovering that you like the sound of being a Nonna. The days in between, the happy days of discovery while your grandson  is growing up to be a smart, intelligent and a loving young boy.  The phone calls when you can’t see each other, the hi and hello, the how are you, the I miss you, the shouts of joy saying “I love you Nonna” and you shouting back saying “I love you too baby”.  The excitement in your daughter’s voice while sharing a copy of your grandson’s report card in Nursery school. He is doing pretty well with very good and excellent grades.

The simple joys of family life sharing meals together, eating out together, sharing stories,  fun moments playing with the grandson. They are priceless moments indeed.

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I remember my last session of chemotherapy done on a December morning at the UST Hospital Benavidez Cancer Institute.  It was a Tuesday, the  Feast of the Immaculate Conception.  My medical oncologist called it my graduation.  Graduation from six cycles of chemotherapy and oral chemo drugs, graduation from the pain brought by the IV injected every three weeks, graduation from various laboratory tests before each cycle of chemo. But it did not end there. I have to go back to my surgical oncologist for regular check-up until five years ago when I totally lifted everything up to God that I am truly cured  and well.  It was a nice feeling to be able to pick up and do regular routines without  having to worry about one’s health, without having to worry about doctor and hospital visits. I hate hospitals. I can’t stand waiting too long outside a doctor’s office with other patients who have their own stories to tell.   Seeing other patients is depressing enough.

When you are sick, sometimes depression sets in but your belief and faith that you will be cured  of your illness helps to combat those feelings. When you believe that you will get well, you will.  I started this blog sharing a bit of what I went through more than seven years ago. I wonder sometimes about those friends I met here who underwent the same journey as I did. Where are they now? I haven’t heard from them for quite a while.  There was a time when some of my posts would be full of sharing about their plights as cancer patients and survivors or some members of the family sharing about it. I miss those because I would want to know how they are now.

Some people say things happen for a reason. I believe though that God allows us to feel the pain of being sick so we’ll get closer to Him. It’s when you are at your lowest that God lifts you up. I remember those lines from  Footprints in the Sand:

One night I had a dream…

I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord, and Across the sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand; One belonged to me, and the other to the Lord. When the last scene of my life flashed before us, I looked back at the footprints in the sand. I noticed that many times along the path of my life, There was only one set of footprints.

I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in my life This really bothered me, and I questioned the Lord about it. “Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, You would walk with me all the way; But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, There is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why in times when I needed you the most, you should leave me.

The Lord replied, “My precious, precious child. I love you, and I would never, never leave you during your times of trial and suffering. When you saw only one set of footprints, It was then that I carried you.

These word often  remind me  to be always grateful for even the smallest blessing that happens in my life.

In times of our needs, we must look back and remember,  He was walking along with us, carrying us on His shoulder.  The times we thought we were alone, the times we thought we carried  the burden, the times we thought we were so helpless with things which we can’t avoid, the times of need, I believe those were the times He carried us through.

 

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