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Posts Tagged ‘reflections’


I am still randomly copying some excerpts from my earlier posts for my journal and which I’m gonna share later at Interaktib. Then I found this, it’s something I wrote  from six years ago.  Reposting it.

WHEN WORDS ARE NOT ENOUGH

Sometimes,

I hide myself behind the flow of words

If you are clever enough

You’ll catch me  peeking

from a curtained window

admiring the view

but never brave enough

to open the door.

Sometimes,

life seems so difficult

and one’s smile catches the tears

one look that lingers

that one goodbye

erases hundreds of hello.

How could you not see

that life  is sometimes

hard to journey through?

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I’m sure we’ll meet again someday

One of these days I guess.

And we would smile and laugh

About those long-ago days

of our youth.

We’ll share more cups of coffee

Just the way you like it.

Friendship is such a lovely thing.

The stories get more interesting.

Along the way, we’ll meet again

That’s a promise.

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Reposting this without the photo. I noticed that those posts I did during the early years have more meaning and  more reflective of how life is. Maybe it’s because this is a life of second chances.

I sat there waiting

for the morning sunlight.

Then she came and perched atop

our bare avocado tree.

I listened to her sweet rendition –

a tweet, a song probably.

As if sensing that I was watching,

she quickly flew away.

And I was left

With a tepid cup of coffee.

Thinking –

I wish life could be this simple.

No extra baggage to carry.

Just this –

a sweet melodious song

a bird in flight

unmindful of what she left behind

but just enjoying what the morning brings

and what she can find

and discover beyond.

And I sit here

still….

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I don’t want to be

the bright and glaring

sunlight on your face.

I’d rather be the moon

that illuminates

your path at the darkest hour

to show you the way.

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Once in a while, I post some excerpts of my previous blog entries at my Memories on Facebook. They are not the whole posts themselves but just a few lines that catch my fancy at the moment. These are some of them which I wrote at different dates….more like different months and years.

The way you look at things probably depends on how you view life itself. As they always say, you could see a glass half-full or half-empty. It does not matter whether you’re 30 or 50, maturity comes not in the number you add to your age but in the richness of experience you encounter making you grow and learn a little more.

I’ve never been good at following “how to’s” unless it’s a complicated recipe that I need to experiment on. Sure, sometimes they make life easier but it is different from following rules that you have set yourself to do. The step-by-step-numbered rules bore me. I wonder if I am alone in this because sometimes I do encounter blog posts like how to learn to be happy or how to be a good writer or how to make your blog more popular(taken from the point of view of the author of course) but in real life we each have certain criteria and values that we wish to meet that we think assure us of happiness and success. It is like reading a highly recommended book but you find it boring. Short of saying “to each his own” we have our way of coping and facing what is in front of us. 

Boring or not, a book never fails to teach me a lesson.

It’s so quiet here, no tv, no radio, not even the noise of passing vehicles can be heard. It’s a deafening quiet and my mind is filled with riotous thoughts – the kind that have no beginning and have no end. Have you ever experienced those moments when you really want to write about them but you don’t know how and they just keep floating in your head? There is something you want to voice out and put down on paper (or shall we say, write in a draft in your PC whichever is more convenient) but it eludes you once you are staring at the blank screen. Whoa! What happened to the rich and jumbled thoughts I had earlier? Life, sometimes, is funny. No, life is funny. Make that three dots at the end.

Peace, serenity, warm welcome, quiet moments, bonding with friends, soul searching – I found them all at Caleruega. God is so visible in that place and to coin the words that describe it, it’s CLOSE TO NATURE, CLOSER TO GOD.

There is that one moment that stands out, so lovely, which makes you say, “I need another moment like this”.

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I posted this reflection back in February 6, 2011. Those were the times when “like” was not yet a feature of the WordPress app. Now you can convert it to emoticons and you can also use other emojis provided by the  WordPress editor. There are no limits 🙂

These are the same gospel  readings today.  And here’s a short reflection that I made back then.

Salt and light are the metaphors used by Jesus in today’s Gospel.   I love how the two words are intertwined – the earth is dark because of our sins and our lives  seem bland because there is no salt in it.  We are included in the mission that Jesus gives us, to proclaim and to announce His Kingship everywhere and to invite people to enter into His Kingdom.  Being a Christian is not just through words, we must make good use of ourselves, our talents, we give taste to whatever we do in life. Christian life is how you relate to people.  Only when we follow Christ’s teaching and examples that we will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Going back to this morning’s mass, I sat in a pew different from the one I usually sit on. And during the homily, I noticed these carvings  like: “CALL ME at this number_______ and something  like : I need a GF with another cell phone number _____. I smiled and thought, maybe, those who have written these words badly need friends. But why would they destroy  the pristine  varnish/coat of the pew to get noticed? I  remember those days when I was still in college, students would leave chain letters near the church fonts or at those seats in the library where I used to work.  I never believed in chain mails/letters even if they contain some religious one that you have to pray for to obtain favors. Faith and worship are not conditional. Either you believe or you don’t.

I bought a few groceries at SaveMore on my way home from church. There is a glaring absence of morning shoppers unlike when  the 2019nCoV was still unheard of.  Maybe like me, they are wary too. Everyday,  we get  updated of deaths and  individuals showing signs of the virus.  You’ve got to have these at home – alcohol (bought a few bottles), rolls of tissue paper and  hand sanitizer. Good thing there is no panic buying here except for finding unavailable face masks for the people’s daily use.  As I have said before in my previous blogs, I often wear face masks (either washable cloths or the disposable ones) when I go out. That started when I got sick more than ten yeas ago. Chemotherapy affects the immune system. It weakens it. And I am afraid of the pollution brought about  by vehicles and motorcycles on the road.

Have a blessed Sunday all.

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It’s been a quiet year for me the whole of 2019.  Come to think of it, I haven’t attended any party with friends except for having dinners and lunches with the family.  Mom is getting on in years so I could not just leave the house for long when she is with us.

Except for that one week vacation in our hometown last July visiting my sick brother and bonding with some relatives, I haven’t gone any place else. It was an eye-opener too  for the family. Nissa was hospitalized twice when she had her thyroidectomy last September and her radiation therapy earlier this month. Thank God, she is feeling okay now although she has to take medications for life. Her oncologist removed her thyroid both left and right.  Thank you too for all your prayers and concern for my brother Alden and for Nissa.

I’ve been calling up friends via Messenger the past few days, getting in touch with those I haven’t seen for quite a while.  It is so nice to be updated with everyone. By the way, you can download the Messenger app on your phone or tab even without signing in to Facebook. How I wish I could talk to some of you too. It is now easier to communicate through this than through Viber. You can easily see who among your friends are online.

Some would probably think what a dull life I am leading. I assure you, I find pleasure in my small garden, so much joy in reading and discovering new books and authors. I am happy playing with Oreo. I find satisfaction in experimenting in the kitchen. Simple life for a simple me.

While I was playing with Nate last Tuesday, he showed me one of his front teeth which is now quite loose.  He will eventually lose it one of these days. Then we talked of the tooth fairy. I told him it is just a myth. He asked me what he would do with it once it comes off. I told him to just give it to his mom.  He doesn’t know where the first tooth  went but he was glad it was replaced by a permanent one.

I am now in my 149th read in Goodreads. I am presently reading a box set of four books. They are all light reads. These are relaxed days before the frenzy of meeting a new year –  new opportunities,  new dreams to uphold. I no longer keep a new year’s resolution since I could not follow it through but I always pray for good health for friends and all members of the family.

I hope 2020 would be a good year for all of us.

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I make it a point to just relax every Sunday after attending the early mass at 6 am.

That means no gardening, no scheduled time with the washing machine, just reheating leftover meals  and yes a lot of reading in between. I am happy starting  Charles Dickens’ David Copperfield the other day.  I am challenged by the Wordscape  game Josef uploaded on my tab a few days ago. And in between reading, I tinker with Block Puzzle Jewel and Match 3 Jewel. I used to dislike playing online games before but as one grows older, you seek venues where you could spend relaxing time too. Since I seldom go out except attending weekly Sunday masses, twice a month trip to the market, grocery shopping almost every week, an occasional trip to visit my internist, another occasional lunch out with the family, you might think life is boring. I assure you, it is never dull. When you are given second chances at life, you always grasp every day and embrace it with hope for another tomorrow. Another chance to shine in your own little corner of the world. Never mind the bad news you always see on television (I don’t watch news anymore). Never mind the annoying happenings which your local politicians are wont to do (mind you, you’ll get stressed out just reading the news). Never mind the traffic even in your neighborhood.

Yes, our street is busy every day of the week. When our car leaves the garage, one has to wait for a few more minutes and let the other cars, e-bikes and motorcycles pass by first. It has become one of those alternative routes going to and from other towns in our province.

Oh what bliss just spending a little of your time waxing poetic about everyday lives, getting in touch with friends  through Messenger, being updated with news on their walls.

Happy Sunday all.

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Once again

I allowed myself to greet the morning sun.

Communing with God’s glory

At six o’clock am today.

The day is blessed with your presence Lord.

And the sun spreads its light

In the deep corners of the earth.

I  rejoice.

I am happy.

 

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“Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.”- St. Augustine of Hippo

One of the highlights of today’s homily are these words:

“To understand LIFE, you have to visit three locations:
1. The Hospital
2. The Prison
3. The Cemetery

At the Hospital, you will understand that nothing is more beautiful than health. In Prison, you’ll see that freedom is the most precious thing. At the Cemetery, you will realize that life is worth nothing, the ground we walk today will be our roof tomorrow.”

When I went home to take care of my brother three weeks ago, I  set aside an hour visiting our beloved dead at the cemetery with my cousin before going to the hospital. Since I seldom take a vacation during All Saints and All Souls Days, I make it a point to light candles and offer prayers in front of their  graves every time I go home. There is always that nostalgic feeling,  remembrance of old days when my dad, my youngest brother, grandparents, aunties and uncles and some close relatives were still alive. Their graves are near each other.

In the hospital when you’re passing by the halls, you’ll see all kinds of reaction from people looking so sorrowful and staring in one direction, people texting or those who spent the night sleeping  along the corridors waiting. I haven’t tried visiting a prison yet but some years ago, I went with my high school classmates to visit a former schoolmate at the National Center for Mental Health where patients are like prisoners caged in open  (with grills of course) rooms  with several beds adjacent to each other.

It is quite depressing sometimes to be able to see hospital patients and those in the mental hospital.  And yes, health is one commodity that makes us rich in life even without those material trappings. Good health is not something you can buy.

I’d like to end up this post with these words.

“Health is the greatest possession. Contentment is the greatest treasure. Confidence is the greatest friend.” 
― Lao Tzu

 

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