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Posts Tagged ‘life with Dad’


I’d like to borrow this quote from Anne Geddes which I think is a perfect description of what a father should be.

     Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad.
Just saw this in one of my notes at Facebook early this morning. I know I posted this here somewhere but I can’t remember the exact date I published it. I usually blog about him during his birthday and birth anniversary. We lost him one December night back in 2007.  We will be celebrating Father’s Day this coming Sunday.
I am reposting a blog I wrote eight  years ago barely a year after we lost Dad.  I can still remember I was crying while writing this little tribute to him.  Good memories will always linger in one’s heart. Treasuring the times that he showed us how much we were loved.  I wrote this on a Father’s Day too.

Yesterday, on my way back to Manila from Pangasinan, I brought home the Kodak Easy Share digital picture frame which contains more than a hundred pictures of dad when he was still alive. My brother painstakingly collated every picture he has in his own album and uploaded it. It’s only more than six months now since we lost him but when I watched and viewed the pictures once again, it seems as if he is never gone. Some pictures have captured him vividly –  a few months after he retired, his daily routine there in the province with mom, his joys in seeing his grandchildren in every important occasion that we had, his delight in meeting old friends and contemporaries, and always, his ever ready smile for everyone. It made me miss him all the more.

 

I am the only girl in a family of three boys so you could say, I am Daddy’s girl through and through. I’ve always found it easier sharing everything with Dad,be it simple things like the news headlines, how to plant and take care of a vegetable garden,how to fix things at home when the hubby is not around and yes, how to throw a ball in one of our rare baseball games in the province. One thing I could never forget though were his stories on how he struggled as a teenager to find work so he could finance his studies. He worked for thirty-one years in UST and that pretty much influenced all of us (his four children) to study there and embraced a true Thomasian education. He taught all of us the value of hard work and the value of always treating other people with respect.

 

It was through him that I learned the basic skills of cooking and he was the one who taught me how to make an estimate when it comes to preparing dishes for special occasions like birthdays and Christmas. I must say, dads really come in handy when they are in the kitchen. For him, it was  “hands-on” all the way. He will just watch you if you are doing it right or not and who would not learn from that? I think guys do cook better, there are more  guy chefs that I know and heard of. Or maybe, they do love to eat that is why they are more successful in the kitchen.

 

I was envious of his skills in playing the guitar together with my uncle (his brother) who used to play the violin.  One thing vivid in my mind was when we were still young and  televisions were not yet in fashion, nights were spent listening to him playing the guitar accompanied by his best friend in our neighborhood who played the ukelele. He even composed a song or two in our vernacular language. Those were the days, quiet ones seeing the other side of my father.

 

Dad was a disciplinarian but he was never strict with us. He would always say,”you know what is right or wrong, follow what your conscience tells you”. Learn from your mistakes, such familiar words that have shaped my view of things. Yes, I do remember one thing that he always reminds us,”you carve your own destiny”.  That was my dad, the ever practical but ever-loving one.

 

I miss you Dad…..happy, happy Father’s day!

 

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Remembering. Always remembering. And it’s like a dull ache that never goes away but just stays somewhere in the recesses of the mind, never forgotten but remembered with joys and pains.

It’s Daddy’s 6th death anniversary today. Every year since I started blogging, I would always write about him during his birthday and his death anniversary. How can you write about the pains of losing someone so loved and cherished in your life?  How can you write about someone who taught you the values of living and taught you how to be strong despite all the hardships that life brings?  Why do you need to remember and cry in pain?  It’s because he will always be a constant presence in my life. 629906-R1-00-20AThe good  and lovely memories will get you through somehow and you smile in remembrance of the long-ago days when you needed to hear life’s stories and words of wisdom, things that somehow shaped your views on what life is all about.

If dad were alive today, he’d be 91 years old. If he were alive today, I know he would smile   and wonder why I am even writing about him. I know he would smile seeing  Nate, his great-grandchild, walk on his own and point to himself and say, “baby, baby”. Yes, Nate has added more words in his vocabulary. I know he would be happy for all of us and would probably say, “there is nothing like a grandchild to put a smile on your face and warmth in your heart”. My children are so lucky having known him as a loving, lovable, affectionate and a caring grandfather. They fondly called him Tatay.

Wherever you are Dad, I know you are looking down on us with an indulgent smile.  I offered a prayer for you today. I still miss you after all these years because you  hold a special place in my heart.

(note: this is my 1,350th post at WordPress)

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Happy new month and Happy All Saints’ Day too. Since  Post A Day Challenge  2011 started, I also made a point of blogging about the last month and greeting the new one. Perhaps you are tired of reading my favorite phrase, “how time flies.” But it does and November comes with a lot of excitement for all of us since this will be the first time in our family  to celebrate a wedding. I told Nissa , it’s  barely less than two weeks to go before her big day. Nine long months of preparation. It surely takes longer nowadays to plan a wedding compared to twenty-nine years ago when I got married.  I am proud of Nissa that she was able to take care of everything down to the last detail with the help of  her fiancé. She was so organized  and they only hired a wedding planner on the day of the wedding itself. I am looking forward to the event. I am also excited to see the trio she hired to sing and play on her wedding.  I always love listening to a combination of violin, piano and flute.  They call themselves Intermezzo Wedding Music. Josh  is a former member of Philippine Philharmonic Orchestra, a friend of a friend of mine.

I slept like a log last night, a whole eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.  I woke up early to attend the 6am mass at Our Lady Of Light Parish. It was kind of sad, thinking of Dad while the priest was delivering his homily. It’s been almost four years now since we lost him.  He passed on before Christmas. I miss hearing his voice over the phone and listening to his stories when he was still alive. And it’s sad that I am not able to visit his grave on a day like this except to offer mass and prayers and light candles at home. We make it a point though to visit him at the cemetery every time we go home to the province. Had he been alive, I am sure he would be very happy for Nissa. Had he been alive, I am sure he would be happy to know that after more than two years of struggles being a cancer survivor, I am now back to my normal activities. I am not ashamed to admit that I was a “daddy’s girl”.

Why do we grieve over lost friends and family members? Why do we feel sad that they are gone from our lives? Why do we recall and reminisce the days when they were still with us? Don’t you think we are grieving for our own loss in losing them? Trite as it may sound, they are happier now with the Lord. The sad fact is, it is hard for us to let go. Let us just think of death as a kind of rebirth to eternal life, a lovely  meeting with our Saviour.

Have faith, move on, because life goes on no matter what we do, no matter where we are. Be grateful for small miracles that touch your life everyday – they make our temporary stay here worthwhile.

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