Journeying Through

There are paths that lead somewhere –

To the innermost corner of your heart ,

And you sometimes feel the pain of rejection

A love lost

A love gone.

Life is never perfect –

But deep within

You say,

I should.

I can.

I will.

Moving on,

Letting go,

Another journey to traverse

With courage,

With faith,

With acceptance.

(previously published at Multiply then reposted it here. this was back in july 2012)

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This Moment

I wrote your name in the sand

Only to be erased by the noontide

But the essence remained

When my morning comes,

I’ll write your  name again.

The breeze whispers a gentle sound of “hello”

Calling me, you

Beckoning us to the world beyond

I hear the sea

And I hear you

Calling, calling my name.

I feel your face

And see you smile

While the ripples gently dance at our feet.

I watch your serene countenance,

And nothing moves

Except the breeze and the ripples

We treasure this moment, this minute, this hour

A silence that inspires us

To write our names again in the sand.

Dusk is falling

And the only remnants are our footprints

And the sea calling our names.

Note: (previously published on March 01,2010)

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Cold at Six

Brrr….it is always cold at night most especially in the early mornings. And I wear socks….haha😄

When Josef reports at the office three times a week, we usually wake up at 4:30 in the morning. I unlock the gate and wait for his officemate to fetch him while he is busy dressing. He leaves at 5am. You might think it is a little early but they start work at 6am. I play with the dogs while waiting. Sadie is the most gentle and touchy of them all. I love it when he raises his two front paws and scratch my back. He always wags his tail when I’m around.

6am is still dark. These are those months from December to February when the nights are long. Pretty nice to just stay in bed and drink a hot mug of tea before going to bed. I don’t do much reading nowadays except for that lovely book by Roger Housden analyzing words, poems actually of those ten talented poets. Not so much familiar with the others but of course, Mary Oliver is a favorite. Read a few poems last night from her book Thirst. She could speak of ordinary things and turn them into a vista of something beautiful.

Speaking our town fiesta, they have another event today, a fluvial parade in honor of the Sto. Ñino will be held today. They call it the Balsa Festival. Balsa is a Pangasinense term for raft. Can’t wait to watch it.

The house is so quiet, even the dogs are still asleep.

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Life

They always say, the journey is better than the destination. Do you agree?

Life is a long road to journey through. We may encounter some glitches and difficulties along the way, it may not be a straight path to our destination, it may be one difficult trail of stones but we struggle through. Who says life is easy maybe avoiding the truth.

We cannot hold time. The hours of the day and every day of the month pass us by. Some become lovely memories that we treasure. I am always of the thought that we carve our own destiny. Our positive outlook in life is a big factor to succeed.

Do you still observe new year’s resolution ? For me, not anymore because anytime of the day, resolutions break. I just tell myself to do the best I can and look at life as challenge to overcome. My health hasn’t been good for forty years now. It started with my preeclampsia before Nissa was born. She was not a full-term baby. From then on, I had high BP and chronic UTI.

Visiting the hospital and doctors’ clinic were more the norm than exception. I learned to adjust to what life is like when you are not hundred percent healthy. The good thing is we have a lovely gift in the person of Nate.

Josef and Jovy came home in time for New Year’s dinner last night, Nissa our photographer was not around so we didn’t have a family photo. It was only the four of us – mom, Josef, Jovy and me plus our two pets Oreo and Cookie running around under the dining table. I took shot of our simple meal with only lime juice as chaser.

Adobo, macaroni salad, pancit palabok, grilled pork and roasted chicken with yummy ensaymada for dessert.

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Not Good

Oh my, on top of my pending cataract operation because my glucose is not normal yet, here’s another news that I have to bear with faith and prayers.

I finally had an appointment with an audiologist yesterday and the verdict is not so good. Forty five minutes of testing. It seemed like I was playing with a joy stick when I underwent three kinds of tests. I was made to listen to different density of sounds – loud, normal, soft and faint which I could not almost hear. Every time the headphone🎧 sounds in my ears, I have to press the stick once. The audiologist discussed the result with me after testing. It seems that I am already classified under severe loss of hearing. The audiologist said I really need hearing aid now. It could no longer be corrected. He quoted a price, 60,000 for both ears and that is already discounted. So expensive. I’ve had already spent so much for my medications.

I’ve been told that it only takes six months before the density of hearing loss advances. I’ll come back to him once I’ve seen my ENT on Monday. Whatever she says, I have to abide by it. There is a need to measure my ears via a mold which will be used for the hearing aid. I am not yet done with other issues on my health and here comes another. I am grateful though that I reached this age despite undergoing hysterectomy, surgical sigmoid operation, chemotherapy and kidney bypass a few years ago.

KEEPING THE FAITH AND TRUST IN GOD.

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Those Days

Yesterday, I wrote about what life is like these days and some of you who are my faithful followers had those uplifting and inspiring comments, thank you.

You had glimpses and snapshots of the things I wrote since I started posting back in July 2009. That’s how long I’ve been writing here though not regularly now. I started with Friendster, blogged about a few posts and when it closed, I opened an account at Multiply and I tremendously enjoyed sharing with about a hundred close friends. I posted my collection of CDs, poems I wrote when I was in college, lots and lots of photos and blogs too. My youngest brother shouldered my premium account until it also closed years ago. A friend invited me to Facebook and I am still there, a co-admin of a Catholic page and two Catholic groups.

The reason why I opened an account here upon the recommendation of a friend was that I wanted to share my plight as a cancer patient and survivor. I had sigmoid surgery back in July 2009 and I painstakingly posted almost every day after I went back from the hospital. Had six cycles of chemotherapy after a month of my operation. Know what encouraged me to write further? It’s the people I met here who had the same ailment like me. They asked how the treatment was done, they asked about my oncologists and where they could find them. The thing was, they came back thanking me and shared their own experiences. What a beautiful journey! Some of them even wrote longer messages than my blog posts. Met two doctors who shared their plight as cancer survivors too.

Whew! I got lost here somewhere, I planned of blogging about my childhood in the province but I got diverted again, maybe on my next post.

I found a book about Tibet and East Timor. Want to know what life is like in those places. Excited! The weather has improved. The typhoon is out of the country now. No more heavy rains but public school classes and public offices are suspended today.🌦☔

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It’s Sef’s Birthday

His full name is Alvin Josef. At home we call him Sef or Osef but his officemates call hi Alvin.

It is his 38th birthday today. Every year, I would take a photo or two on his birthday. There was a time I collated all his birthday photos which I started when I was new on Facebook. Every year we get to celebrated by ordering food online and sometimes I cook one or two viands when I am not so busy. I took a shot early this morning before he left for work at JP Morgan Chase bank. If you’re wondering why he is in maong pants, they are allowed as long as their shirts have collars. All their clients are US based.

I went to the wet market early to buy something to cook for dinner although Sef told me not to prepare anymore.

For the first time in a while, I saw the orange hue of the sky breaking into an early morning. The clouds looked three- dimentional paintings in the sky.

HAPPY AND BLESSED BIRTHDAY JOSEF. Love you so much.

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Thank God It’s Friday

Hey friends, I am back after almost a week of not even visiting WordPress until now.

It is summer here now and it is so hot. We are due for some house repairs and supposed repainting but then again I am so lazy to contact a carpenter to do the job.

Alden is in the hospital at the moment. He had colonoscopy yesterday and ultrasound this morning. They will probably go home this afternoon. They are renting a room for my niece who serves as their runner when they need something from outside the hospital. He is in a three-bed ward so only one companion is allowed. He had to have another blood transfusion before his scheduled colonoscopy. I am praying he could recover soon. Please pray for him. Thank you so much.

I don’t think this is funny. VP LENI was interviewed a few days ago and they asked her about her favorite book. She said To Kill A MockingBird then went on to explain why. She was influenced by it on becoming a lawyer. Those detractors who don’t even know the title of the book bashed her again saying that she didn’t answer the question. She did but knowing how they seem to be all-knowing, they probably thought that To Kill A Mockingbird is not the title. It is just so annoying that these pretenders don’t even know a good book. If you are a reader, you remember the story and the title of the book which is your favorite, right? Which reminds, I like to reread that book one of these days. I don’t know where my copy got to.

Talking of being lazy, I finished three books by David Baldacci lately, The Fix, The Fallen and Long Road to Mercy. They are all so captivating. Enjoyed the read. I am doing some spiritual readings too for Lent. Watched a new episode of the Fourteen Stations of the Cross at the Hundred Islands in our province in Pangasinan.

By the way, today is April Fools Day and I am again reminded of the song The April Fools.

In an April dream
Once you came to me
When you smiled I looked into your eyes
And I knew I’d be loving you
And then you touched my hand
And I learned April dreams can come true

Are we just April fools
Who can’t see all the danger around us
If we’re just April fools
I don’t care, true love has found us nowLittle did we know
Where the road would lead
Here we are a million miles away from the past
Travelin’ so fast now
There’s no turning back
If our sweet April dream doesn’t last

Are we just April fools
Who can’t see all the danger around us
If we’re just April fools
I don’t care, we’ll find our way somehow
No need to be afraid
True love has found us now

There you go. HAPPY APRIL 😘🌷💐🛻🌞

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New Year With The Family

We had a great time celebrating together. Nissa, Obet and Nate came over to spend lunch with us. It was a simple but lovely celebration. I had a lovely time playing with Nate at the garden. Posted some shots of him at my other blog Precious Bundle of Joy. Sorry, could not post the link except the title, seems not to work on a tab.

Our group shot with 92-year old mom.

Nate always has that lovely smile.

Our two fur babies Oreo and Cookie with Josef and Jovy.

The two of us, look at my white hair….haha!

With Nissa and Nate.

Our lunch spread.

New Year’s Eve

Nissa took so many shots. These are just some of our New Year photos.

A blessed 2022 to all.

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I Miss You…Still

Here I am again sharing some thoughts about my late dad.

We spent grade school in the province except Noel who transferred here in Manila during his last two years of grade school because be was the only one left there. The four of us graduated at the Univ. Of Santo Tomas Education High School. College life was also spent in UST.

I remember the summers way back then. That was the time we spent the summer break going to Manila to be with Dad. That was in the mid-60’s. Mom, my three brothers and I would ride in a Pantranco bus with two bundles of firewood meticulously gathered before our trip. We used charcoal and firewood to cook back then.

When we reached high school, summer days were spent in the province. I remember planting cashew nuts with Dad which eventually grew along the perimeter wall of our one-hectare lot. We also planted Formosa pineapples. They still bear fruits until now. Coconut trees are scattered all over.

At first, it was just the three of us, dad, my older brother and I stayed in our very small house in Quezon City when I started high school. Mom and my two brothers were left in the province. Do you believe that I started reading Mills and Boons pocketbooks when I was in high school?

Dad would bring home three or four pocketbooks which he usually borrow from the UST high school library. After a week, another batch is borrowed. It was where I learned more about those lovely places aside from our country. I worked for a while at the Humanities section of the UST Main Library way back in college. That’s where I learned serious reading because of the many subjects/books that I encountered.

Gosh, every year since Dad died, I would blog about him during his birthday and death anniversary. Perhaps you’ve read about those anecdotes that I have shared before.

Today is dad’s 14th death anniversary. I miss him…still.

🥲😒❤🧡

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