If he were alive today, he could have been 96. He left us ten years ago. Until now, there is still that void that I feel with his passing. Sometimes, I could still imagine him reading the daily news from cover to cover. It was always his pastime so when he was alive, I made it a point to have a daily supply of the newspaper in our place.
I miss those days when he would recall how he struggled in early life so he could find a nice job to support the family. My three siblings and I all went to his favorite university where he worked for more than thirty years. I miss those afternoon when we would take coffee and light snack and he would recall the earlier days of his life, the hardship of being a working student, those times he was away from his parents and siblings while he worked in the city. I don’t remember his mom, my grandmother. She died giving birth to their youngest. What I only knew according to my grandfather was that I looked like her.
We could talk about anything under the sun. We could talk about family members who went away to find good jobs. His two sisters and a brother (through a second marriage of my grandfather) work abroad. Two are in Spain with their families and one resides in Japan. I am almost as old as my youngest aunt.
I miss those days when I was in high school and it was only the three of us (my oldest brother, dad and I). My mom stayed in the province with my two younger brothers until our youngest transferred to Manila to study when he was in grade school. The days when he would teach me how to cook…..priceless. He would usually drop by the wet market after office work and he would teach me how to prepare a simple dinner. I was not just a bystander when he was in the kitchen because he would just instruct me what to do and watch me cook.
I miss those days when we would spend lunch together when I was in college with one of his co-workers. Every day, he would buy food at the UST resto before my class ends at 12 pm then we would share lunch.
When he got sick with ESRD and had to undergo dialysis treatment, my older brother and I accompanied him to the hospital twice a week. The days he was bedridden after each session of dialysis, the enormous medications he had to take to stay stronger. the graceless time he had to wear a catheter for many months, I still remember them all. My dad was a fighter. It was so painful though to watch his deteriorating health. For each session of dialysis he lost weight.
We lost him one December night ten years ago. He may be gone from us but he still lives in my heart and the memories linger.
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”
― Elisabeth Kubler Ross
All I can say is I know! It never goes, but finding peace with it is good! Best wishes, Haley x
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Thanks a lot Haley. It is so nice to see you here.
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What a sweet man you have described here; the grief becomes a resident in our hearts, doesn’t it? Gentle peace to you, and I hope your memories offer comfort, Arlene.
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Thank you so much Kitty. I love your words. Yes, you are right. Memories are great comfort to us.
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My sympathy on your loss. Like you, I lost my beloved Dad ten years ago. Now my mom, at 87, is in declining health and my sibs and I just keep thinking, What would Dad want? How lucky we both were to have wonderful fathers!
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Yes, we were lucky to have them in our lives. My mom is turning 89 this April and her right ear is totally deaf. She is hard of hearing and sometimes forgetful too. Thanks for visiting mom Shieb.
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It’s always so difficult t cope up with the loss of a loved one, but their beautiful memories lay imprinted in our hearts and they bring a smile to brighten the day!
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The beautiful memories – they make us smile and laugh sometimes and they make us feel happy. When the longing starts, I feel sad. Thank you Radhika!
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Beautiful tribute to your dad. It’s those wonderful memories that keep us moving forward after the death of a loved one.
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It’s nice to see you here Angeline. Thank you so much.
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Arlene, your father sounds like an amazing man. What treasures these memories are now! As you miss him, may the legacy of his life & love & tenacity continue to inspire & encourage your heart. ✨🌟💜🌟✨
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Thank you so much Virginia. I am inspired by your words.
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Your dad left wonderful memories. It’s no wonder you miss him.
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Thank you so much Anne!
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I miss my father, too 😦
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Oh, they live in our hearts.
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I also had a wonderful father and he has been gone 15 years now. He was such a blessing and I miss him everyday. Like you, I treasure the memories! God bless.
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We each have our memories that will tide us through the years. God bless you too. thanks for the visit.
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A fine tribute, with a beautiful portrait of a sensitive, gentle, man
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Thanks Derrick!
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The legacy of love left by caring parents is indeed priceless, Arlene.
Best wishes, Pete.
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I agree with you Pete. We remember, we remember it through the years.
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I’m so glad you have so many wonderful memories with him.
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Thanks a lot Joanna.
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A beautiful tribute and it is good to remember and honour those who have loved us.
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Thank you, thank you so much!
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A wonderful tribute to a special gem. I lost my Dad 22 years ago. He was a gem too. 🌼
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Thank you so much Brigid. 22 years…a longtime ago but we still remember them with love and fondness.
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His kindness and compassion come through so clearly in this photo. Thank you for taking the time to share about him with us.
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You’re welcome. Thanks too for appreciating it.
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A touching reflection, Arlene. Your writing brought back precious memories. I could relate to how parents and other elders would always tell stories to the younger generation, about their hardships and challenges growing up.
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Thank you so much! May I call you Carla?
Yes, those days, those precious moments that we were allowed to get a glimpse of what life was like during their growing up years….really priceless.
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Of course you may.
Thank you for sharing! 🙂
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